Look who's going to be TWO

NonaJane is going to be two next month. In 3 weeks and 6 days to be exact.  Thankfully with all the distractions in my life right now I haven't had time to panic about this.  Until right now.  Now I am panicked.  She won't be one anymore. She definitely won't be a baby anymore.  She will be TWO.
She has discovered some new sayings lately, and upped her cute and sassy factor by 10.  She will now tell you to "Go Away" if she doesn't like what you are saying or doing.  When people ask her her name she now confidently replies with "Nona!".  She dances like a wild woman to music, sings along to "Happy" and "Let it Go", and can officially climb anywhere and jump off of anything. Last night she was jumping off the end table, knocked my lamp onto the floor and broke it.  You know, really cute stuff.  She can count to 10, but her favorite thing to do is repeat random numbers until you can't take it anymore "8, 9, 8, 9, 8, 9, 8, NINE!!!!"  She likes to sing the alphabet too, but she seems to get stuck at 'H', so she will just start over. and over, and over again.  And if you dare try to help get her PAST the H, she will yell at you.  And for some reason I think it is the CUTEST thing ever.  Every time she gets stubborn and yells, it makes me smile from ear to ear. Her strong will, her seriousness, her mission to be independent, it is all my favorite stuff about her.  She loves to color, especially on the table when you aren't looking. She is really pretty good at coloring too. She likes to use a wide variety of colors, she fills the page, and is already proud of her work yelling "Watch!!" and "look!"  She continues to eat a wide variety, stealing food off her brother's plate and pretty much begging all day long. "Hungry" might be her favorite word.  Our little girl knows what she wants, and usually won't give up until she gets it.

NonaJane you bring such joy to our lives. You make me smile and laugh, you push me around and challenge me.  Yet despite your stubborn front, you are the sweetest thing.  You love to give me kisses, and you hold onto my arm when I read to you. You sing along with me at night "you are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me HAPPY", you are bursting with joy when I get home from work, and you miss me if I leave the room for a minute.  You love me with such passion, with such joy.  You demand that you want "mommy" and you aren't afraid to tell people "NO!"  You speak your mind, you   live every moment to it's fullest. You exude enough happiness from one squeal, one smile, one giddy dance, to make every frustration, every challenge, every exhausting moment simply melt away.

NonaJane, we LOVE you.

Clinging to my raft, riding the tidal wave

enjoying lunches at Fritz's

apparently I have been too busy to take pictures
 that are actually related to this post… so instead
enjoy some of these cuties :)

Sometimes things in your life can get really still… almost a boring still. Like you're just waiting for something big to happen. For a rock to be thrown into that still glassy pond.  Not that there isn't a serene joy when you come upon the stillness, the perfection, of an undisturbed pond. But it seems that the temptation to throw boulders or handfuls of rocks is just too great.   Similar to how fun it is to kick your legs in a pool as hard as you can until the surface looks like the ocean.

Jack all dressed and ready to go to WORK

My life was kind of like the serene, calm, and beautiful pond- a few weeks ago. Truth is that I'm just not at a point in my life where I am ready to relax and appreciate the quiet.  So what did I do? I threw a boulder. Or two. Maybe a dump truck load into that beautiful pond.  First I went and sold my car back in December to drive the 1,000 dollar car (which has now greatly amplified it's squeaking and rattling.  My mom said it sounded like a bucket of golf balls rattling down the side, and my co-workers said it sounded like a large rock was perhaps stuck in my wheel.  Either way, pretty sure a car shouldn't sound like that. But it's still running:)) Then this week we sold our house.  We sold it in under 24 hours, and for asking price!  I'm starting to have my panicky moments when I realize "holy crap. We SOLD our house" why on earth would we do that!?  But, figure it is a little late for those thoughts so we better ride these tidal waves that we have created.

Jack posing in front of the toastytote display… plastered in OUR pictures!!!

 A little update on the housing front… our tidal wave will NOT be taking us to the home which I previously blogged about.  Turns out (thru inspections) that the home was being held up by 2x4's and decorative porch posts (not exaggerating), there was a significant water leak in the attic, and a sewer back up which was causing draining water from the tub to come up through the sink.  Adam said "HELL no", thus the house search continues.  We are circling around a lovely for sale by owner home.. but haven't made the official commitment.  Our only fears with making the dive is that we will be making a significant cut in square footage. But that is neither here nor there (HA hadn't used that little nugget for a transition in awhile!)

Meanwhile… while we were creating this chaos at home, I received several emails from Hoffman International (Jack's talent agency).       1) Jack's Ball Jars commercial was picked up for television use! 2) Jack and NonaJane were both presented with opportunities to attend a casting to work with Hallmark.  All week Adam was driving them to and from auditions and castings (from which they were chosen!)  Complete craziness that it all happened to fall in the midst of placing our house on the market,  and trying to house hunt ourselves.  The kids both did great at their photo shoots. So much so that Jack was called back this week for another shoot! The director on the set informed Adam that they would likely be using our kids "a lot"!!!

Jack's head shot

Then today, I joined my neighbor Christian with his toastytote team down at the WW1 museum in Kansas City.  His company was part of SparkLab KC which is a mentorship  for local entrepreneurs.  Today the 10 companies involved in SparkLab gave their 'pitches' to Kansas Cities biggest investors.  We're talking about people with fancy loafers, goofy glasses, and money falling out of their sleeves. Ok, I didn't actually see money falling out of anyones sleeves, but I'm pretty sure I could smell it on them.  I mean we got a fully catered breakfast AND lunch. Not donuts, there was yogurt, fancy granola, jams, and cakes with drizzly icing and nuts on top. Serious stuff here.  The food was served on bamboo plates with servers hovering to see if you needed more water!  Anyhow, since I have become the 'face of toastytote'… (I know, I know, pretty famous. But try to control your excitement.)  The team needed me to be part of their pitch. I basically worked as their on-stage Vanna White. I demonstrated the use of the toastytote, moving it thru it's 5 different uses for the audience to see.  Afterwards there was a bit of a meet and greet, or mingle you could call it.  Many of the investors took time to talk to me,  praising my demonstration skills and asking me if I have demo'd other products (Ha! yea right).  But the biggest revelation of the day is that toastytote is possibly working their way to QVC.  If they do…. guess who might REALLY get famous??? Only the 'face of toastytote'!!!  Almost as famous as Jack's forehead and hands in the Ball Jars commercial!!! I hope you are lining up for autographs tomorrow :)

So here I am, sitting in a wave pool clinging to my raft.  Feeling mildly panicked, the adrenaline rushing, partly wishing the water would calm… but very well knowing that as SOON as it does… I'll probably throw another rock.  Life is short, let's enjoy the ride while we can.

We shall not be bored...

This time, last year… so many things have changed. The kids, the car… 

Our manicured lawn in late Spring

Things have been happening around here again. Which is kind of exactly how Adam and I like it.  Neither of us can stand to be bored, even if just for a moment.  So we have busied ourselves over the years with a variety of home projects, renovations, and makeovers.  First to mind was the basement, the landscaping, the endless painting, redo's of the bedrooms, tiling the shower, re-carpeting, re-furnishing, re-roofing, upgrading appliances, changing out fans and fixtures, and we think… we JUST think after 6 1/2 years that we have finally got this house right where we want it to be.  (Except for maybe a storage shed out back).  So clearly the ONLY logical thing to do at this point in time, is------- to sell it.
Well maybe it's not logical to YOU.
Most people seem overwhelmingly shocked when they hear the news that we plan to move. But really if you know us, and you really take a moment to think about it, it makes perfect sense.  We've done just enough to the house to put it at the top of the market for our neighborhood, and to give us just enough equity to sell it with a nice little cushion in our pocket.  AND, if you know us, we have been itching to move out South for awhile now.

The "for sale" sign that caught our eye

the new project!

Over the past month we have heard circulating rumors about the state of the real estate market here in Olathe.  Apparently it is pretty hot.  I looked into it, and sure enough there is a housing shortage and houses are flying off the market.  Of course this gave us the itch and we decided to see what was available down in Paola (where my office is located).  We spent a few weekends touring the community, checking out the golf course, the schools, parks, pools, Lake Miola, the town square, drive in theater, the gym… and fell in love.  The lifestyle change, the financial change, the opportunities… all of it.  We started by looking at homes out in the country and were repeatedly disappointed by the high prices and less than appealing homes.  We had given up looking for the day and were driving thru the town to stop at Dairy Queen when we passed a for sale sign.  A quaint old home sitting on the corner, with stately trees, a large front porch, and clean landscaping. We toured around the outside and found it was empty.  So we got out and let the kids explore the yard, while we took in the exterior of the home. The details in the retaining walls, the nice flat yard and asphalted drive, the composite decking and front porch swing. It quickly gained our attention. We decided to call the realtor on the sign, and she happened to be around the corner (which probably happens a lot in a small town.)  She let us in and we spent the next hour examining the home.  With it's shag carpet, green counters, 60's fixtures, and heavy draperies… we were sold.  We have found our perfect project.  Our next endeavor. We shall not be bored….  Our heads started swimming with ideas. Ideas to renovate. To expose the old hardwood floors, to showcase the original woodwork. Plans to make built-ins, plans to makeover the kitchen and again create a space all our own.  A home we can be proud of, a home where the details are all ours.

The backside of the home. Off to the right is a nice backyard, and a good sized garden!

Our heads started expanding with even bigger ideas and dreams.  Joining the community country club and letting Jack grow up on the golf course.  Taking our kids to drive in movies, and spending sunny days on the lake. Storing our camper on our own property. Walking down the sidewalk to the public library, or riding our bikes to the pool.  County fairs and rodeos, parades that will pass in front of the house.  Then hopefully, after a few years, investing in some small rental properties and finding investment opportunities that someday… maybe someday… will get us out on land with a home that suites our dreams. (not that we would want to be bored though!)



So here is the Plan:
Our house here in Olathe will be placed on the market next Friday. Our new home in Paola has a signed contingency contract… and is just waiting for us to transform it.

A sneak peak into the inside… we can't reveal too much or you will think we are CRAZY :)
Did I fail to mention… this new little home of ours was about 90,000 less??? moving on UP!??? 

their beautiful little personalities

Jack and NonaJane are at a very fun age. An age in which they can play, laugh and giggle with each other. They truly entertain me to my core.  In the morning NonaJane wakes up and asks "Jack!??"  and when Jack asks her "Nona, do you want to go play pirates?" she replies with an enthusiastic "Yeahhh!!!"  When I pick them up at the gym, and Jack walks out pretending he is a zombie, a little NonaJane is following him with her arms outstretched in front of her moaning in tune with her brother.  She thinks he is hilarious, and he thinks she is his best little sidekick.  My days are filled with "watch!! Watch me!!" and "LOOK" as NonaJane imitates the stunts of her big brother.  Whether it is jumping off the arm of the couch, attempting to mimic a summersault, or coloring her face with a crayon… I am never less than entertained.  Especially when I can hear her informative big brother calmly attempting to correct her "No, NonaJane. You should be coloring the bear BROWN." or "NonaJane, you can't use your shirt as a pocket."  On the other side I get an angry little girl tattling on her big brother. Screams of anger and "Jack DOWN!" when he pushed her down. Or "NO no no no Jack… NONA's" when he takes something away from her.  But my favorite moments, are when they snuggle together on the couch (blanket and all) and watch cartoons.  Jack always lets her pick the show and he manages the remote.  Jack usually tries to hold her hand, and gently snuggle her close.  She usually appeases him for a short while, before her snuggling quota is full.  Then she prefers to sit beside him, smacking his attempts to hug her away.  Their beautiful little personalities shining thru.

"Ta-Da!"

"I've got this"

Just yesterday we were at Kohls. I placed NonaJane in the proper 'baby seat' of the cart, and placed Jack inside the canvas portion where it clearly states "do NOT let children ride inside the cart".  Next thing I know NonaJane has climbed from her seat and joined Jack in the forbidden area.  The two of them make a game of ducking down and hiding from passerby's, then jumping up to say "hi".  As I'm perusing the isles of clothing I realize that I am actually ENJOYING myself at a store with both my kids.  I find a shirt I like, and ask Jack "which color should I get?"  Without much hesitation he points to a deep pink color and says "The pink one Mom. You will look like such a pretty married girl in that one!" So I bought it.  And I will feel so pretty when I wear it. Because Jack said so.  Of course the honeymoon period at Kohl's ended when NonaJane figured it would be more fun to throw all the items I DO want out of the cart, and instead start filling it with items I could care less about.  For some reason Jack thought it would be a good idea to remove all their shoes, and Nona ate the tags off the items before we had a chance to purchase them.  All was well with the world, a hectic state of normal.  A state that I love and appreciate more and more everyday.

NonaJane creating a masterpiece (i.e. a really big mess)

Swim Lessons

NonaJane sticking to Mema

My mom has been taking water aerobics from an intense instructor up by Weatherby Lake. She has been encouraging me for over a year to sign Jack and Nona up with her for private swim lessons. Swearing to me that she is able to teach babies and toddlers not only survival skills, but how to swim.  Well I finally broke down and decided to call Mandy.  We headed up for three weeks in a row of hour long sessions.  Jack was his usual over-achieving and super eager self. He jumped right in and really listened to the instructions Mandy would give.  On the first day she already had him floating on his back, diving down for rings, and being able to swim forward with his face in the water about 5-10 feet.  By his third lesson, he could jump in from the side, push off the bottom and swim forward about 15 feet!  He floated on his back for over 10 seconds, and is starting to work on stringing the skills together.  Mandy's biggest fear with Jack is that he is now over-confident and will require close supervision around the water.

NonaJane sneaking around and throwing all the water toys in 

NonaJane on the other hand… well she decided to do a 180 on us.  Our daughter who has always enjoyed the water with us decided that she did NOT like this pool.  She would taunt us and stick her toes in the water saying "wet!" but if we dared to pry her from the edge she would only cling to us like an octopus ( I imagine they would be very clingy).  She would then proceed to yell "OUT!" and if that didn't work she would resort to "OWIE!" which got a great reaction from the very elderly aerobic class that was in the pool with us. The sweet ladies would one by one come over and say "oh, you poor thing." or "Do you like the water?"  to which NonaJane would only reply "NO" (add extreme emphasis and exaggeration on the "N" sound and a quick snappy sassy ending on the "O").  One extra-fragile looking woman told Nona "your so cute, would you like to go home with me?" to which you can only imagine the "NnnnnO!" that she got from Nona.  So three weeks in a row, NonaJane refused to participate (other than to throw rings and every other object into the pool and giggle when it sank).  Thus Jack got the full hour to himself and seemed to really thrive!
I have no doubt that when summer hits Nona will love the pool. She will love the lake, the boat, and puddles of water. She dives under the bath water at home, blows bubbles, and splashes with delight.  She has no fear of the water, or swimming, or getting wet.  Mandy was sweet and said that is was probably the stranger anxiety, mixed with a foreign place, mixed with a large pool that looked like an ocean.  I will agree with her and say that surely, my sweet beautiful, and confident little girl was not just being defiant :) no no.  Not Nona. My children are much too perfect for that.

Jack learning to back float on day one

Jack's spot

Somewhere along the way over the past year or so, Jack has made a habit of nestling himself into our bed.  He falls asleep alongside me at night, and when Adam gets home from work he carries Jack into his room and tucks him into his own bed.  But most nights… somewhere between 6 o'clock and 8:00 o'clock in the morning, we hear his door bang open and the pitter patter of little feet down the hall. He jumps up on the foot of our bed (where we handily placed an ottoman making it easier for him to make the climb) and crawls his way up to to the head of the bed.

Adam has been known to complain to others about how Jack plasters himself to his back, steals his pillow, and snuggles to him so tightly that he claims he will surely fall out of the bed (I've yet to see this happen).  Whereas I am left with 3/4 of a King size bed all to myself :) Nice and roomy, I can snooze right on thru the morning hours.
However this morning, my alarm had gone off to wake me for work. Only a few moments later I heard the familiar sounds of Jack's door opening and the pitter patter of his feet. As I felt him inching his way up to Adam's head (to hug and smother him like a small monkey) I softly whispered "here Jack, you can have my spot. I have to get up for work anyways."  To which I received the sweetest, honest, and most sincere reply:
"But Mom, I already have a spot."
 He proceeded to glue his body to Adam's and return to sleep.

I slipped out of bed and looked back to see flat lifeless sheets covering the majority of the bed, and one large lump where both Adam and Jack were nestled together on the edge. My heart swelled (as if it isn't hard enough to get out of bed before the sun) and I came to the conclusion that I will never pity Adam for his complaints.  This officially enters my records as one of the sweetest moments with Jack.  One of these days, Jack will no longer eagerly awake in the mornings just so he can come get in our bed.  Until then… I will rather enjoy the view from my roomy side of the bed.

I just couldn't wait

Adam and NonaJane cuddling on the couch to cartoons

I know I blog a lot about time. How time keeps marching on. It seems to be a prevalent issue in my life right now.  I'm stuck in a re-occurring battle with time.  So far time is winning, but I am working on coming to grips with it. I am working on coming to a truce, a compromise, a win-win scenario with an unforgiving opponent.  Tonight Adam and I went to see a movie and the kids were with Grandma and Grandpa.  It was a lovely, calm evening. But the same thing happens anytime we go out without the kids.  I thoroughly enjoy myself, yet I always find myself greatly missing the kids on our way home.  Realizing how thankful and grateful I am for them.  As much as we enjoy going to the theater, or having a nice dinner out... I am thankful for my chaotic usual of eating leftovers off the kids plates, giving baths, and doing laundry as the kids watch episodes of 'Sid the Science kid' on the couch. I assume other mothers get this feeling too, surely I am not alone.  So on the way home from the theater, in a moment of feeling sappy I began to talk to Adam AGAIN about wishing I could freeze time.  Keep our kids at the ages they are, and stay this way forever.  As he tried to rationalize with me and give me a pep talk about how much fun the future is going to be, I had a giant realization.  My whole life, I couldn't wait.  I couldn't wait to turn 5. I couldn't wait for the 3rd grade. I couldn't wait to drive, to be old enough to date, to go to high school, to go to college, to graduate from college, to get a real job, to get married, to buy a house, and to have kids.  I couldn't wait.  I was always in anticipation.  Anticipation is a great thing.  A growing excitement in the pit of your stomach. A count down to a dream, a moment, a beginning, an unknown.  There was always something I couldn't wait for. Until now. Now I have it. I have exactly what I always couldn't wait for.  I have Adam. I have a beautiful home.  I have a job I love.  I have an amazing boy, a joyous daughter.  I have it and I don't want to let it go.

Jack and Adam

I came to this realization, and broke into tears.  I am not excited about, nor am I anticipating, the future. I am trying to relish my daily life but my kids grow and change before my eyes.  I finally understand why I am stuck clinging to the past and the present while Adam, on the other hand, can dream and anticipate the future.  Adam continues to have excitement for the vacations, the experiences and the memories to come.  He has it all right. He is looking at the glass half full, and knowing there is more room for joy and love to fill it.  Whereas I am looking at the glass as if it has a leak in the bottom, and is being slowly stolen away.  My rational side can see this now (as of this very moment) and is realizing that fear of the future will steal away the joy of it.  Living in anticipation is not the same as "wishing your life away" which people always warn you not to do. Perhaps instead, living in anticipation is just a healthy way to enjoy the present, and embrace the future.  I don't want to look back at my kids life, and realize that I clung so much to things that I was unable to enjoy the 'dance' or the way life plays out.

Jack learning how to take selfies on my phone

I don't think that my realization tonight will 'fix' my emotions.  But perhaps the realization will help me understand it all and to make sense of it.  Perhaps I will have to remind myself of this often.  But here is my note to Jack and Nona... If you look back at me, your mother, and think I was a crazy lady who cried at weird times, hugged you for too long, or lingered by your side too often.  Just know, it was because your father and you made my dreams come true. You were and are everything I dreamed, and wished and hoped for my whole life.  So it is hard to anticipate the future, when my dreams didn't extend beyond this point. I'm living the dream... and trying to make it last.  Don't worry, your father will dream enough for us both. I have no doubt that Adam will continue to take me places I've never been, expose me to things I've never done, and drive me crazy with schemes and plans that put me outside my comfort zone. That is exactly why I married him. I can rest assured that life will remain entertaining... I just don't have to worry about planning it. I'm to a point where I CAN wait. I am happy to wait. I can wait for birthdays, for holidays, for milestones, and life moments.  I can wait for tomorrow, and the next day.  I have found my patience.  I am thankful for this blog, and these pictures. I am thankful for my family, the complexity of life, and the emotions that come with it.  Even when they make me cry.

The kids and I playing in our recent snow storm