A note about how everyone is nicer than me!

Paola is pretty darn awesome.  The longer we live here, the more amazed I am.  It has also been a bit humbling… I majorly need to 'up my game' when it comes to being a friend. Don't get me wrong, I have always cared deeply about others, and I try to be a good friend.  But I kinda suck compared to everyone we have met since moving here! We have simply been floored by the generosity and thoughtfulness that we have felt.  There's been way too many instances to list them all… but I'll give some recent examples.

What this cookie needs… is MORE sprinkles

Last week the kids and I were invited over to the Black's house to decorate cookies.  Meagan had prepared the cookie dough, had icing of every color, and a plethora or cookie cutters and decorating paraphernalia. I brought a few jars of sprinkles. Red, Green, and yellow (for good measure) and it's not like I went out of my way.  I already had the sprinkles sitting in my cabinet. Course Meagan already had about 5 jars of waaaay better sprinkles.  Ones shaped like Christmas lights and multi-colored shakers.  Anyways, she opened her home (not to mention fed us dinner) and then proceeded to let her daughter as well as my 5 and 2 year old roll, cut, bake, and decorate sugar cookies.  As you can imagine the process was very clean, there was no mess at all.  Then at the end of the evening, Meagan sent us home with a tupperware full of cookies (and told us to keep the decorative tupperware) and THANKED US for coming.  What?? Why are YOU thanking ME? Did we not just crash your home, eat your food and then make out like bandits with your delicious cookies? I mean really, have I ever been this nice to anyone??

NonaJane, Jack, and Bella working on the cookies

I was proud of these… so much so that I needed to take a picture

Last night we were invited over to the Richter's house for dinner.  I thought I would up my game, so I brought two little gifts that I had seen on Facebook.  I cleverly placed a can of pop in a canning jar, then with twine I tied on a miniature bottle of liquor. "Enjoy a drink on us! Merry Christmas from the Schwatken's".  I also made a delicious dessert to share after the meal.  I was feeling pretty confident that we weren't going to be bummer dinner guests.  Upon arriving there was a spread of appetizers on the table, drinks were offered (I admit I had half of a hard apple cider and it was delicious. Sorry Matthew for being baby #3.)  The meal was delicious- smothered pork chops, green beans and mashed potatoes.  After dinner, they said "kids.. do you want to open some presents??"  They had wrapped special gifts for Jack, NonaJane, AND MATTHEW!!! All we had brought was some lousy liquor.. and in miniature bottles! What good is that?  Her kids may never forgive us.  Luckily Grace's birthday is around the corner so we can attempt to redeem ourselves.

NonaJane, Jack, Grace and Bella

We also went with the Black's to see the Christmas train ( I did take Grace along with us.. so I suppose that was nice…).  I volunteered to drive since I now have a vehicle that seats 7! ( look at me.. doubly nice right?? yeah, well then Meagan went and bought all the kids bags of kettle corn. See what I mean? Super generous)  The Christmas train is the same one that goes to Union Station, but we were able to see it down here in Drexel.  BEST THING EVER. There was NO line.  We literally walked thru the train twice without waiting.  Then we went and sat on Santa's lap (after waiting for about 2 minutes in line).  This experience was a million times more enjoyable than going to Union Station during Christmas time.  Every year we have tried the Union Station thing. I have had some delusion that it would be like a Christmas movie, but it turns out to be a crowded hell hole.  We get nowhere near Santa, we squeeze thru crowds, and leave bitter and hungry.  Well NO MORE! Thank you small town, thank you very much.

Grace and Jack with Santa (Jack is anti-sit on Santa's lap)

I have also started to find that everyone is really connected to someone else in this town. Someone is so and so's cousin, or brother in law, or best friend.  Everywhere we go I am starting to have people smile and say hi to me. (Sometimes this is bad because my brain can't keep up with all the new names and faces. Did I meet them at church? Work, Jack's school…. ahhh!)  I even had a stranger at church tell me she already knew who I was, and knew the kids' names because she had heard about us!  (that sounds creepy now.. but I think it was a good thing really).    Either way, she offered coloring books to my kids and that was a blessing.  We even got a handwritten card from someone (whom we don't know) in the church saying how "wonderful it was to see our young family at service".  What is the proper response to this.. do I send a card back? Do I hunt them down at church and thank them? Or do I just take the kind words and let it make my day?
Anyhoo.. I think the moral of the story is that everyone is nicer than me. I'm not exactly sure why they even invite us over!  BUT, perhaps in time these qualities will rub off on me and I too will be the type of friend and neighbor that welcomes people to the community. Just let it be known, if you are reading this and a friend of mine… that I appreciate you.  I appreciate the thoughtfulness, the words, and the actions of others.  Hopefully in time, they will feel it all reciprocated back!

Jack, Grace, and Wesley. The "three amigos" of Sonshine Pre-school

Sweet Moments with NonaJane

Family Pictures 2014

We had our pictures taken in late October. We were lucky to get them in with how RAINY it was all month. On the good side, our pond filled up. On the bad side, we had to cancel our pictures three times before finally getting them done. But the result was well worth it!! I was 23 weeks along with Matthew T in these pictures. NonaJane was a complete doll thru out the photo session… we shared these with Hoffman (Jack's agency) and are thinking if NonaJane shows interest we may sign her up when she turns 4 as well.

Thank you little car!

Our new (and pleasantly used) 2008 Acadia!!

Well the $1,000 dollar car has given us a great year. Can you believe it?? We drove it for a full year! Admit it, you all thought I was crazy last year when I sold my car and bought this.  Well, it may have squeaked over every bump, and squealed around the turns, but this car was GOOD to us. Technically we still have it, and Adam has been driving it to work and back to save miles off the truck. It doesn't have carseats in it anymore so it doesn't get used for daily stuff.  We can all thank Baby Matthew for the purchase of the Acadia. I came to the realization a month or more ago that three carseats were NOT going to safely fit across the backseat of the oldsmobile.  They do sell special 'narrow' carseats.  But I worried about Jack going into a booster, and then his head being right up next to his siblings plastic carseat… then we realized that the seat belts in the back were stretched from having held in carseats for so long.. that they lacked the spring reaction to tighten up on their own when used for a booster.  It was kind of the final straw for me… just couldn't risk having my kids not be safe.
Nona and I will have fond memories of the time the giant spider made a web INSIDE the car and I got to fearfully whack it out of the car with a folder (only to then accidentally roll it up IN the window effectively squishing and smearing the spider remains across the window). NonaJane had the unpleasant honor of sitting by that window… and pointing out the "spider" each time we got in.  I know, I should have just washed it… but you couldn't really run the car thru a car wash because the doors didn't properly seal. I wasn't about to hand wash it (blame the pregnancy).
I also have new found appreciation for heated seats, and doors that actually seal. We no longer need to pile under blankets for a car ride.

But, we absolutely can NOT complain. We had the Oldsmobile for a year, Adam replaced the brakes, and we had the oil changed and tires rotated.  We drove over 13,000 miles, and didn't have a single mechanical problem.  Not many cars that you can say that about with 212,000 miles on them!
So here is hoping that the Acadia will treat us well. That it will keep our family safe, and provide us with the ability to give rides to our little friends as well!

Giving our friend, Grace, a ride home from Kingdom Kids. (And NonaJane with full blown pink eye…)

Thanksgiving 2014

The youngest: Nolan (2) Luella (3) and NonaJane (2)

We took the Acadia on it's first big trip just 2 short days after purchasing it! We headed out on Monday evening towards Wisconsin, but decided to make a two day trip out of it and stopped in Iowa at a hotel. The kids had a blast swimming in the pool, we all enjoyed a good nights sleep and a pretty darn good complimentary breakfast.  We were able to make it to Mark and Katie's by 1:30 on Tuesday!  It was definitely a calmer Thanksgiving this year with no babies in the house. In fact, there weren't even any diapers in the house! All grandkids are potty trained, eating real food, and sleeping in big kid beds.  But no worries, baby Matthew will change that up for next Thanksgiving.

Clearly having a stressful day… not

Katie, as usual, cooked a delicious spread every day.  We had the classic Thanksgiving Feast on Wednesday, and enjoyed the leftovers on Thursday.  I think my favorite this year was actually the Turkey! It was super good!  We watched our usual "Christmas Vacation" and also managed to see "Home Alone" as well as "Elf". Jack refused to watch "Home Alone" because he doesn't like the part where the burglars go thru a string of injuries. Particularly the part where he steps on the nail.  I'll chalk it up to him having a tender heart.  But am thinking he went a little far with that one.  Anyways, as I'm sure you can tell, it was a very stressful few days :) There was a nice amount of alcohol, games, and laughter. (I can still only imagine the stress though of being a host to 8 adults and 8 kids for 3-4 days!) We continue to be so thankful to Mark and Katie for hosting Thanksgiving each year. I believe this was the 5th year?? All I know is that the entire Crabb family looks forward to Thanksgiving each year… in all honesty it just might be my favorite holiday.  What is better than the entire clan coming together, the simplicity of food, relaxation, and time together?
 

Family movie night. Nolan and NonaJane on the floor. Then from left to right is Adam, Me, Jack, Julie, Luella, Katie, Hudson, Mema, Henry, Ethan, Michael, and Everett

Things weren't always as calm in the "kid zone"

The miniatures table

Mark carving the turkey

Wisconsin had some beautiful snow fall while we were there, and the kids played outdoors twice a day.    I was excited that Jack and NonaJane got some time in the snow, seeing as we haven't had any yet back in Kansas.

Everett even got an honest to goodness STRIKE!

On Wednesday when Katie was in the midst of major cooking, we cleared the house out by taking half the household to see a movie, and the other half went bowling. We were part of the bowling crew. My parents and Everett chose to come with us, which I was pretty excited about. I haven't had much opportunity to have time with Everett, and he was excellent company!
We made the journey home on Friday, and it was pretty darn smooth sailing for a 9 1/2 hour trip! Would you believe that NonaJane wore big girl undies the whole car trip there, all week, and the whole trip home without a single incident.  I think she has got the real hang of it :)

snacking… always snacking… and drinking

Now if we could get her to stop playing with the straw and lid until her water spills all over her and she rides home in a soaking wet car seat...

Our Jack Jack

 A few weeks ago I was having a pretty upsetting/stressful day at work.  Then when I went to pick NonaJane up from the sitter.  I was told (and shown) how she had bitten the other little girl (sorry to throw you under the bus NJ, just telling the day how it was). Apparently Nona had become irate when the other little girl turned the TV off (as she had been told to do). But NonaJane doesn't always like to follow the rules, and her poor little explosion of frustration could only be managed by a flesh clinching bite. (At least I assume this must have been how she felt).  SO by the time I picked Jack up from school… I was feeling a little down.  We jumped in the car, and I unzipped his backpack to find this note
         "Jack is such a joy to have at Sonshine. He is a great friend to others" with a big smiley face adorning the note.

Translation "Baby Matthew, your family loves you"

This little note was a bright shining star on a day that had otherwise gone to hell in a hand-basket.  Jack has always had a way of doing that. He brightens the room, and you can always count on his tender heart and big brain to cheer you up anytime of the day.  I swear he tells me at least 10 times a day how much he loves me.  Lately he always follows it with "but I Love Jesus MORE".  Not sure if he was taught this at Sunday school, or at pre-school… but he now feels it necessary to clarify his level of love for me.  I smile and tell him "of course" but the terrible side of me is a tad bit jealous of Jesus :)  I hear Jack telling NonaJane daily that he loves her too. He hugs on her and includes her in his play. He tells me how excited he is for baby Matthew to be born (which he so cleverly spells as Mathu… can't really argue that now can you?)  Now don't get me wrong, Jack will occasionally hit NonaJane, he jumps on the couch, and attempts to sneak candy canes off the tree… but really, that's about the extent of it.  He has even jumped on board the parenting train and tried to help Adam and I out with rationalizing with Nona "Nona, you chose to ride in the cart with me, you have to sit down" or "Nona, you can't have your dessert because you didn't eat your oranges." It surprises me that he sticks his neck out there to reason with NonaJane, because it usually results in a rather large back lash from his sister "JACKKKKKK!!! I don't sit, EVER!" or "JACKKKKK NO!!!!!"  but he stays calm and will attempt to reason from a different angle "but if you don't sit you could fall," or "I didn't get my dessert either because I don't like oranges".

After Thanksgiving, Jack was very eager to write his Christmas list.  By eager, I should probably say he was having a mild anxiety attack.  He was panicked that he would change his mind, ask for something that he wouldn't really like, or that Santa would not put him on the nice list (which was simply crazy talk).   I think we had to have at least 3 heart to hearts that all would work out, that Santa would surely have him on the nice list, and that he had plenty of time to write and make changes to his Christmas list.  Well this zealous 5 year old little boy jumped on the computer, went to Toys R Us, and started internet shopping.  When he found a picture of a toy he liked, he would copy down the name of it onto his Christmas List.  In a word for word EXACT manner. Such as "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Movie Basic Action Figure Donatello".  Lord Help Santa Clause to bring him the exact item he asked for- because we all know he won't forget (and of course there are a million different teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures.) I asked Jack to confirm with me which picture was the one he wanted, he explained to me with all his wisdom that I really didn't need to worry about it. He would show me which one it is when Santa brings it for him!
 Jack's Hallmark pictures that he took in the Spring have also started popping up on the Hallmark website. Which has been really fun and exciting! Now I have to periodically check into the Hallmark website, because they don't notify you or anything.  Hopefully I haven't missed any!

Did I forget to mention...

Did I forget to mention we are having a BOY??  I think I did.  Minor detail.  We found out almost two weeks ago!  The discovery that our little baby is a BOY, was very exciting.  Yet, at the same time there was a small part of us that was a bit sad about knowing Nona will be the only little girl.  It was a feeling that is hard to explain. We were excited about a boy, but something about knowing Nona's little clothes won't be worn again, or that Nona won't have a little sister to grow up with, it just seemed very final.
  Adam seemed to be in shock for at least the first 24 hours before he settled into the idea that baby #3 is a boy.  He expressed it like this:
"Jack is my little buddy. He and I are going to do everything together.  I tell him all the time that he is my favorite little guy.  Now we will have to learn how to share that with another little boy." Adam just wasn't sure about how baby #3 might change his relationship with Jack.
Jack on the other hand… was nothing but ecstatic.  He told us "this is the BEST day of my life! I can't believe we are getting a BOY! Just what I wanted!"  Jack doesn't seem to have any reservations about sharing his life with another little guy.
NonaJane ran around the rooms saying "baby boy, baby boy, baby boy" so at least she knows what to expect.  However, pretty sure the whole thing is still abstract and weird to her.
I, on the other hand, was overwhelmed.  I was overwhelmed that the dream I had before I was even pregnant was coming true!  (A literal dream. The kind you have when you are asleep. Not just a hoping kind of dream). I had dreamt of our family of 5. There were three children, and the third little boy was already here.  So ever since I found out I was pregnant, I have thought and hoped that it would be as it was in my dream.  The best part??? The little guy already had his NAME in my dream as well (so I hope you are reading this Michael T Crabb and Mark Tyler Crabb)  …

Matthew T Schwatken

I figured I had better go ahead and share, as Jack and Nona are already calling him baby Matt.  Often times using his full name Matthew T.    The T (and his initials MT)  are in tribute to my brothers.  I loved growing up as baby #3, and I loved my big brothers.  So for me, this name is absolutely perfect.  To the MT's in my life,

Love you Michael and Mark.  

life just keeps on changing

One of the lovely meals I have made :).. yes I AM bragging. I can do that
It is MY blog after all!

Life has been changing around here again.  I guess that is to be expected… seems like things are always changing.  But the biggest change for us is that Adam is now working on a first shift job.  Meaning he works 7:00am to 3:00 pm instead of 2:00pm to 11:00pm like he has for the past 4 years.  Knowing this change was coming is what motivated me to jump on the "learn how to cook so you can be a good wife and mother" bandwagon.  Now we have family dinners at night! Like the kind where you sit around the dinner table and eat food together!  But it isn't as picture perfect as the movies (yet…) because we have to beg and bribe and yell at our children to get them to eat.  BUT… they ARE eating which in itself is a GIANT step forward.  I am a bit annoyed by how long it takes me to make dinner, and clean it up, only to have two mildly ungrateful children balk at it.  But, these are the sacrifices we make. Right???

NonaJane decided she would dress as a worker bee
for the day… ALL day

So Adam being home at night has its definite advantages. For example, when NonaJane gets out of bed for the 10th time-- I'm not alone.  When the kids fight about getting into the tub, and then complain about getting out of the tub (I mean really?? Why do I have to convince you to get IN AND convince you to get OUT??)  but the point is.. I'm NOT ALONE!  I so appreciate his presence at night.  However, after the children go to bed, Adam keeps sitting in my spot on the couch. Not cool.  I sit there, and I watch whatever I want on the TV.  So obviously there are some glitches and compromising that must take place.  But I'm sure we will work it out.
The early mornings aren't too bad at all either!! At least not for me.  I'm not the one who has to get up at 5:30  in the morning to go to work.  You would have to ask him how he feels about that one :)
So what other changes are occurring around here?? Well, our beautiful property is full of gorgeous colors and leaves.  The massive number of spiders seem to be dwindling (thank the lord) and Jack seems to be growing up overnight.  Would you believe he was picking dried worms up off the driveway? He also stomped on a grasshopper that NonaJane and I were trying to have a conversation with (No, I did not condone this. I was quite shocked and taken back by the unexpected squashing of our little friend. But I was equally amazed that my little boy who has never been much for the rough and dirty activities is finally starting to!)  Jack has also been hungry lately.  If you know him… this is a BIG change.  My little man has never been one for eating. It was more like punishment. But lately he has been asking for second servings!  He has also been eating dinner with us, and eating what WE eat! Even things like carrots, tomatoes, peppers, etc.!! Seriously!!

I found Willie the wildcat on our couch one morning… he had ripped
a hole in the screen and jumped thru the window!  Mischievous...

An update on NonaJane… well… NonaJane scares me a little.  She is bossier than ever, and sweeter than ever at the same time.  Kind of like a light switch, or one of those sweet and sour candies from the commercials.  For example, she may go ape crazy on you if you try to help her onto the potty.. but three minutes later she may be hugging on you and telling you how much she loves you.  She has developed her language to a point that we are now getting whole conversations, and she is using the potty like a champ.  By far the easiest potty training experience!  She stayed the night with her cousins at Mema and Papa's house this past weekend.  Mom reports that Nona would start singing "Twinkle twinkle" and if her cousin Luella tried to join in Nona would yell at her "You NO sing!"  So… obviously not the   most caring or generous of children.  Let's just all hope that she doesn't grow up to be a big meany. Okay? At least her adorable little face is deceiving enough.  We get comments all the time about what a "cute and sweet little girl" she is.  I smile and giggle on the inside.
As far as me. Well, I feel like I'm swelling like a blimp. I'm 22 weeks along and feel like 40.  But who's complaining (besides me obviously)?
I'm off to make some dinner now...

finally settling in

view of some fall color from our front porch

Our pond filled up!

We think the trees along the drive are going to turn red!

Nona and Luella at the pumpkin patch

It was a good day yesterday.  Maybe the first day since our move that I felt reassured that it was right.  It just felt like everything was finally coming together, or at least I was finally seeing thru the stress and chaos and recognizing all the good that were happening.
Moving was more stressful than I expected it to be. Not just the packing, cleaning, sorting, hauling, and unpacking.  That was really the easy part.  It was the adjusting.  The waking up in a new home.  Not knowing how many steps in the dark it took to get to the bathroom. The fumbling around in my daughter's room to find the light switch when she cried out for me at night.  The unfamiliar sounds, smells, and feel of a new home.  Not having a flow in the kitchen, a routine, or any sense or normalcy.  I wasn't expecting it to be so difficult. Perhaps I dreamed we would move in and I would immediately feel comfortable and cozy. But I didn't.  Nothing felt quite right.  The furniture seemed out of place, I couldn't find the perfect spot for all my things… and 8 gallons of paint alone was not enough to solve my discomfort. Even 1200 square feet of new carpet could not give me back my old home, my old sense of comfort and normalcy.  I missed my routines. Life seemed easier before the move.

That is Willie the wildcat peeking in on me thru
thru the sky-light in the bathroom.  Sneaky
little thing.

But while I was busy complaining about the work inside the home,  how giant spiders were taking over my world, and how nothing ever felt right…. good things were actually happening.

Since moving here Jack has started attending Sonshine pre-school in town.  He complains that he doesn't learn about space,  gravity, or all the novel ideas that he thought school would bring. He was disappointed that we sharpened all those pencils, placed them neatly in his pencil pouch, readied him for handwriting and math problems...and he never gets to use them.. but really he loves it.  They do creative arts and crafts everyday, they go on field trips, and he has new friends.  Apparently he has so many new friends that they bicker over who will get to sit by him. Luckily Jack hasn't really noticed this, but the other parents have started to comment toAdam and I about how much their kiddos talk about Jack.  He was even invited on his first 'date' by a sweetheart in his class (rumor has it she calls Jack her boyfriend :))

Jack exploring our backyard

Thru these friendships, I have made friendships.  These Moms are absolutely amazing.  Yesterday while Adam and I were at work, a fellow pre-school Mom volunteered to take Nona along with her as she chaperoned the  field trip to the fire station.  Then another Mom invited Jack to their house after school for a playdate.  Apparently on this play date my son (JACK) ate a dinner of sloppy joe's carrots and green beans.  They informed me that he ate great, and they had no idea he was a picky eater.  As I stood in shock, utter disbelief, Jack danced around me and talked in manic speed about his awesome day.  How he got to spray the fire hose at the fire station, how he ate green beans and carrots, and sang new songs at bible school.
While Jack is off having a blast at preschool, NonaJane has been spending her time at the new babysitter's house. Adam's co-workers wife, Meagan, has started babysitting for us during the week.  NonaJane loves her house so much that she rarely wants to leave to come home with me. She plays so hard with their daughter, Bella, that Nona normally falls asleep before we even make it out of town.  Nona gets excited and asks to go to Bella's house, and nothing makes my heart feel better then knowing that my kids are happy and excited about their new routines. Meagan has been so generous in sharing her home, and her time with my kids. She has been unbelievably flexible and laid back. So much so that I still can't get her to tell me how much she wants to be paid.  So I pay her on my own accord (which we all know can be dangerous with what a tightwad I am). So I pay her, and pray that she is not secretly hating me!

The leaves beginning to fall, and our pond full off in the distance (thanks to all those heavy rains!)

But as the night was coming to a close yesterday, I looked at my phone and saw a text inviting us for dinner and a movie Friday night at Meagan and Bella's house.  It all just hit me at once. I may no longer have neighbors that live next door. I may not be able to walk 20 feet to borrow an egg.  But, we are building a network of amazing friends in our new town.  New friends who are not only willing, but who volunteer to spend time with our kids, who invite us over, and who want to know us.  I'm thankful for this move. I'm thankful for our beautiful home and property, even if it did take me WAY out of my comfort zone.

NonaJane wearing my old shirt!