A year ago we had a bad day. It turned into a bad week, and the bad seemed to manifest and creep into everything. When you feel like you are being beaten from every angle. But then a year goes by. You look back and think, was it really that bad? Did time heal the wound, or was it all played out exactly how it was supposed to? Perhaps I am more grateful now for the good days, and the fingers my husband still has. Or am I just now more fearful every time he walks out the door to go to work. I think he is tired of me hollering "don't cut any fingers off". It's kind of like "break a leg" or "drive safe". Just a saying that we have around our house now. Life really does play out like a roller coaster. There are ups, and downs, but in the end your left smiling and breathless. Undoubtedly God has purpose in this. Last July, July 11th to be exact, the same day that Adam's finger was lost (tragic pause).. we also miscarried, and I felt like I was losing part of my destiny. A child that was supposed to be. I felt hopeless, and terrified that we would not have any more children. That seems silly now as I watch NonaJane sleeping on the floor beside me. But it is how I felt. Sitting in the emergency room, watching the ER nurse temporarily sew Adam's finger back on and at the same time losing the dreams and hopes for the baby that was supposed to be safe inside me. It was a bad time. Then I think our oven broke and and I probably stubbed my toe or something stupid but everything felt monumental at the moment. It took awhile, but Adam's finger healed and looks pretty normal, besides being stubby. He received a settlement from work which helped towards the purchase of his new truck ( I think he loves the truck enough that the finger was worth it). On September 9th 2011, Jack's 2nd birthday, we discovered that we were expecting again. Now I sit here a year later, a healthy baby girl, a working oven, a mildly mangled husband.... and life is good. Thank you God for loving us, thank you for having a plan, and thank you for the gift of life, the gift of love, and the gift of every day.
A year ago we had a bad day. It turned into a bad week, and the bad seemed to manifest and creep into everything. When you feel like you are being beaten from every angle. But then a year goes by. You look back and think, was it really that bad? Did time heal the wound, or was it all played out exactly how it was supposed to? Perhaps I am more grateful now for the good days, and the fingers my husband still has. Or am I just now more fearful every time he walks out the door to go to work. I think he is tired of me hollering "don't cut any fingers off". It's kind of like "break a leg" or "drive safe". Just a saying that we have around our house now. Life really does play out like a roller coaster. There are ups, and downs, but in the end your left smiling and breathless. Undoubtedly God has purpose in this. Last July, July 11th to be exact, the same day that Adam's finger was lost (tragic pause).. we also miscarried, and I felt like I was losing part of my destiny. A child that was supposed to be. I felt hopeless, and terrified that we would not have any more children. That seems silly now as I watch NonaJane sleeping on the floor beside me. But it is how I felt. Sitting in the emergency room, watching the ER nurse temporarily sew Adam's finger back on and at the same time losing the dreams and hopes for the baby that was supposed to be safe inside me. It was a bad time. Then I think our oven broke and and I probably stubbed my toe or something stupid but everything felt monumental at the moment. It took awhile, but Adam's finger healed and looks pretty normal, besides being stubby. He received a settlement from work which helped towards the purchase of his new truck ( I think he loves the truck enough that the finger was worth it). On September 9th 2011, Jack's 2nd birthday, we discovered that we were expecting again. Now I sit here a year later, a healthy baby girl, a working oven, a mildly mangled husband.... and life is good. Thank you God for loving us, thank you for having a plan, and thank you for the gift of life, the gift of love, and the gift of every day.
Gotta go get a Kleenex...
ReplyDeleteSigh....makes me so happy when your happy
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