Dear Matthew- sorry your siblings are morons

Helloooo Mr. Turtle.  A game your sister likes to play with you...

Oh my dear Matthew. You are 6 months old tomorrow! Did you know we share birthdays in a way? My birthday is your half birthday (I'm sure I will have pointed this out to you every year... not to beat a dead horse).  Funny in a way- I have always teased how my nephews tried to steal my birthday as 4 of them were born within days of MY birthday.  Who knew that all along it may actually be my own baby who shares my birthday with me?!

SUPER Nona, Matthew and Jack!

I'm thankful that you are 6 months old tomorrow.  We've made it thru some of the most challenging days.  Remember the weeks of sleeping on the couch with you? Of course you don't... but I do.  Remember the nights of midnight blogging while you swung away and laughed at me in your swing? (I think I only imagined the laughing as you innocently refused to sleep.)  6 months already, and you are no longer an infant in my eyes.  You are becoming a big guy, and an even bigger joy.

this looks innocent enough, but really your brother might be pinching you here...
or thinking about yanking on your arm at any moment.

captain muscles showing off his planking skills

I think with every child I have joked at their first birthday that "we did it! we kept them alive a full year!"  well with you, this joke seems less funny... I'm not sure how man kind has survived all these years because as SMART as your siblings are... they can act like total morons around you.  I know they love you, they want to be around you all the time.  They ask to hold you, and they constantly try to play with you and entertain you.  BUT, they also jump off of you in the same manner that you would jump off a boulder.  They "roll" you across the floor in the same manner that you would flip a tire.  They seem to think that you would like to smell their feet, lick their toes, or have them sit on your face. I don't understand it.  I get mad. I yell at them, I explain to them that you don't actually LIKE this, that you just can't get away from them.  They inform me that "he is smiling!"  Which actually does worry me a little.. why are you smiling!?  Maybe this is normal for a third child.  I haven't really heard other mother's talk about it, so I feel like it is some great failure on my part.  But perhaps this is one of those unspoken things?  Well I'm breaking the silence!  I apologize to you for the inadequate care you are receiving.  I do try- and as I said, I'm grateful that we celebrate 6 months (and my 32 years) tomorrow.  Plus, I'm pretty sure you are going to grow up and be quite a bit bigger than either of your siblings anyhow.  You can sit on their faces then, you have my permission :)

That's right little man. Learn how to escape! Crawl Crawl!

Happy 1/2 Birthday little Matthew, and Happy Real Birthday to Me too.  Thanks for being a permanent distraction to my own birthday, and for giving us a little something extra to celebrate.
P.S. I promise I'll always share my cake with you Matthew T.  (that's saying a lot you know.)

"Mom WATCH!"

My cuties... who I can't stop watching

The first day of kindergarten is lurking over my shoulder like an ominous storm cloud. My anxiety is rising and my kids just won't stop. They won't stop getting bigger, smarter, and more independent.  All things to be more than thankful for- I know. But at this rate, things just keep changing too fast and I can't handle it. Matthew is learning to sit, and today got onto his hands and knees.  NonaJane is continually developing longer sentences, using bigger words, and getting prettier by the day.

A miniature ninja turtle

sitting?!

and LOOK at that face? Beautiful! but definitely not a baby anymore

And then Jack. Jack is learning how to do everything himself, and needing me less and less. For example, Jack can open/shut the car door AND buckle/unbuckle himself. In all honesty this is a HUGE relief for me. It was only a few months ago that I was angrily yelling at him to "TRY! Jack, please just try to buckle yourself so I don't have to climb back here and do it!"  I literally was angrily yelling at him to hurry up and grow up (because it is quite awkward to squeeze myself between two car seats to reach him in the third row).  And he listened. He did grow up, right before my eyes, and in response to MY demand.  He also dresses himself now, which I know most kids his age have been doing for years. But MY Jack never did.  He had no interest in what he wore, or whether or not he ever got dressed.  Underwear was fine attire for the day. Thus if we were going anywhere I would literally have to dress him (the same way I had since he was a baby.  "lift your leg, push your arm thru... etc. etc."  Now I can just say "Jack, go get dressed!" (mind you I still have to say it 10 times...). He can also make himself his own sandwich for lunch, rides his bike without training wheels, tie shoe laces, and can read most signs and books for himself if you ask him to.
Do you see what I mean? He could move out at the end of the week.

OR, maybe not.

this little guy doesn't even need me! Just floating away...

We went to the Paola pool this weekend. His friend Grace was jumping off the diving boards.  With great excitement he announced "I want to do THAT!"  I don't usually get too overprotective, but I honestly wasn't sure he could swim well enough to try this.  Adam was there though, and he seemed confident that Jack would be fine.  

Jack opening his own back account. With his OWN money from his WORK

Jack climbed that ladder with such confidence.  He strongly strode to the end of the board, gave us two thumbs up and did his PROUD dance.  (You have to really know Jack to know his proud dance.  But nothing in the world is better than the smile and joy he exudes when proud.  So proud that it makes him burst into dance.)  He promptly jumped, and without struggle he bounced to the surface.
 He kicked and bobbed
and swam right to the edge.  All I could imagine was his little 5 year old body suspended over 12 feet of water- deep water that I have spent 5 years protecting him from. This deep water is now his playground.  Before we knew it, he was climbing the ladder to the HIGH dive.  Adam and I were confident that he would NOT jump.  I mean, this is the kid that won't get on a kiddie ride for any amount of bribery.  But he did it.  He conquered it. And then he did it again. 

He was so excited that I took him and NonaJane back to the pool today.  Jack's learning curve was off the charts as he was no longer doggy paddling, but now swimming underwater, using a freestyle stroke, and even talking to me while swimming across the deep water.  He was doing well enough that NonaJane and I went back over to the shallow end so she could enjoy the froggy slide.  As I played with NonaJane and watched Jack in the distance, my heart began to hurt a little. Or a lot.  My little boy was jumping off the diving boards, talking, dancing, and playing with the other kids in line.  Trusting the lifeguard to keep him safe instead of ME.  But as if he knew my heart was hurting, he yelled out to me across the pool from the end of the diving board "MOM! WATCH ME!!!"  he did his proud dance, two thumbs up, and then a spinning twist off the diving board.  My little boy still wanted me, and NEEDED me to watch him.  He came running down to the shallow end, jumped in next to me and said "I was getting lonely down there without you."  If only he knew, his Momma's heart was the one hurting- and as usual, he has a way of making my heart absolutely explode.  NonaJane, Jack and I had a blast at the pool. NJ loves to jump off the edge to me, and of course wants me to "WATCH" with every move she makes.  So "WATCH!" I will.  I'm going to try to watch and love every little jump and splash they make.  For as long as they are excited to show me.

The summertime blur

4 months and sweeter than pie :)

Matthew T is rapidly approaching the 5 month mark!! He is becoming a little role poly, using his new skills to move around the floor. He is also very handsy- starting to grab anything and everything that comes near him.  Of all our babies, he seems to have changed the most from month to month!

Happy 4th!

Everytime people see him they remark about how different he looks! For starters, he kind of went bald for awhile... but now he has already got a super full fuzzy head of hair coming in.  I just love the way it feels on my face, and have even found him rubbing his own hands all over his head!! It is that perfect peach fuzz length :) His eyes keep getting bigger and bluer, and now his face has started to lengthen out. It is still not clear who he is going to look like... but it is becoming clearer and clearer that he is going to be a happy and laid back little guy.  He is still very easy to please, and a joy to be around.

Wheelbarrow racing!

NonaJane went to vacation bible school in June, which was really her first time being 'dropped off' and left somewhere.  Of course she didn't seem bothered in a bit, but it tugged at my heart strings a good deal.  VBS was 3 hours a day Monday thru Friday.  I wasn't sure how well NonaJane would participate and attend... but turns out she won over the hearts of several ladies.  On Friday evening after their final show, one of the teachers came and sought me out.  She told me that Nona was such a sweetheart and had brought her joy all week, she THANKED me for bringing her.  I felt like my heart could have burst hearing someone else love and appreciate my daughter like I do.  NonaJane is really growing up recently, but still a giant ball of wild :)

Late summer nights :)

 Despite all the rain, this summer has been a blur of late nights, swimming, slip-n-sliding, trampoline jumping, firework watching, and hot dog eating. Having three kids sure does keep us busy, but I think we are pulling it all off all right :) Having amazing friends has helped us out though... a LOT.  Guess who sat at our house until midnight when we had to take Jack to the ER? Guess who goes to the pool with us to even out the score between kids and adults? Guess who feeds me dinner when I get off work late, or who picks our kids up from vacation bible school? I'm thinking about including them in our annual family picture this year... because the Blacks have become a pretty integral part of how we function.  The other day their daughter Bella said it best when she matter of factly informed Jack that "I AM your family Jack."

Swimming at the Black's house

A little sprinkler and trampoline action

T-Bones game on Father's Day

Our annual family picture at the Height Reunion in Schleswig Iowa

Egg cracking.. in July

we survived our 3 year check up... and SHOTS

poor kid was having some hair issues...

Helping Mom make waffles with the new waffle iron

NonaJane and Matthew having a picnic

The unplanned, unpredictable, and EXCITING life this week

NonaJane (3) Nolan (almost 3) Luella (4 1/2) Henry (6) Jack (5) Everett (5) Hudson (7) and Ethan (9)

 

Mark's family was in town on Tuesday, so we had to get the kids all together for an updated picture (minus Matthew)

Sometimes things don't go as planned. And with 3 kids, it seems that more things tend to go in the "unplanned" category more than ever before.  While the majority of America is out watching firework shows, or dangerously blowing things up in their yard, I am home writing a blog post.

Happy 4th of July!

NonaJane started running an unexpected fever during a fun family game of Monopoly, so I decided it best to bring her home rather than share the germs with her cousins. We came home, cuddled on the couch and let some Tylenol take the edge off :)  But in all honesty, I don't mind a bit missing out on the fireworks.  I'm enjoying the sound of them off in the distance, with the mesmerizing humm of Matthew's swing here beside me.  There is something so comforting about being home.  On top of that, it has been a rather exhausting week...

Papa and Jack on the Navy Pier in Chicago

Last Wednesday evening I received an email from Jack's agency that they wanted to submit him for a casting in Chicago for the TV show "Fuller House" (the spin off to Full House!).  The character is DJ Tanner's middle son.  A 6 year old boy who is very intelligent and a bit neurotic.  What a cool opportunity!  Adam was a bit nervous about what a role like this could mean for Jack, and for us... but we decided the bottom line is that Jack has a real knack for this, and most importantly, he really enjoys it.  His Price Chopper commercials are airing more and more...  and we get such amazing feedback about what a natural he is on camera.  The directors are always amazed at how quick he is to learn lines, and obviously... how stinking cute he is.  So we said "Yes, submit him!"  Come Friday evening around 5:00, we were notified that he was indeed selected to audition!  Sunday afternoon Jack, my Dad, and I hit the road to Chicago. (Adam stayed home with Nona and Matthew)  Jack had several pages of lines to memorize, and as usual he learned them without too much trouble.  We made the most of our fast trip, touring the Navy Pier, enjoying a night in a hotel, and trying out some Chicago style pizza.  Jack walked into his casting call on Monday at 4:00 his confident, happy, and bubbly self.  They don't let the parents come back with them, so unfortunately I don't get to witness him in action.  But Jack came out smiling ear to ear, and told me he had a great time.  Can you imagine walking into a room with adults you don't know, standing alone in the middle of an empty room in front of a camera and lights, to be interviewed and perform your lines??? YIKES! But Jack somehow isn't phased by it!

Being stalked by the seagulls while trying to eat our pizza

Too many hours on the iPad makes for an uneasy stomach :(

We haven't heard any news yet.. and may never hear anything.  But either way, we enjoyed the trip, the special time with each other (how often do I get to sit and talk with my Dad like that?? 16 hours in a car is just what we needed!), AND Jack has now had exposure in front of a pretty big casting director... so who knows where any of this could take him?!  I told Adam that one of the highlights of the trip for me was how Jack would reach up and hold my hand everywhere we went.  It hit me that with Matthew in my arms, and NonaJane needing my hand... that Jack doesn't really get my hand very often.  It also made me realize that as he rapidly approaches the age of 6, that he may not reach for my hand much longer.  The thought brings tears to my eyes, and I cherished those 36 hours where all our attention was just on him again.

The point when we decided an X-ray was a must

       





 

Thursday of this week, we were at our friends house and I decided to jump on the trampoline with the kids.  I was being silly and jumping all over like a maniac... next thing I know I hear a chilling scream from Jack and instantly knew it was serious.  I had inadvertently double bounced him and he landed badly on his left ankle.  It didn't take long for it to swell up like a baseball. After a dose of ibuprofen, and 3 hours of ice... we decided it needed to be x-rayed.  Jack made the ER nurses swoon, and charmed the Doctor along the way.  I was so nervous I could have puked, but luckily it did turn out to be a severe sprain with perhaps a small fracture that was not significant enough to worry about.  They provided a temporary cast and said to leave it on for a week.  Jack (as most men tend to do) has enjoyed letting us carry him around and tend to his every need.  I'm crossing my fingers that he is up and running around in a few days like the Dr. predicted...

The beautiful month of May

Jack's pre-school graduation

Isn't May just an awesome month? I mean really, who couldn't love the month of May?  Beautiful weather, and monumental events: graduations, birthdays, Mother's day, and the start of summer!

It was 8 years ago that I fell madly in love with Adam during the beautiful month of May.  I can still remember the way he made me feel, our first dates, and the unbelievable force that drew me toward him. Once we met, we never spent a day apart.


Last May I was both petrified and excited as we upheaved ourselves from our first home, the place our family had began, and moved into our new home. May was full of boxes, organizing, de-cluttering, and preparing for the next chapter of our lives.  It was full of hard work and determination, full of forging ahead and not looking back.
AND...3 years ago our baby girl was born in the month of May.

That's right, NonaJane turned 3 on May 10th!  It was another reason to celebrate, and we decided it was her turn to have a big birthday party.  We decided on a bouncy themed party. Jack helped me come up with the wording for her invites- "Let's Jump and Bounce, Laugh and Play, come have some fun on NonaJane's 3rd Birthday!"  We had planned to give NonaJane a trampoline for her birthday, but ended up giving it to them early (back in March because Adam and I are TERRIBLE about waiting to give presents.  We're always so excited about the gift that we give it early...)  but anyhow, the trampoline was the inspiration for her party theme.

NonaJane looking beautiful and poised beyond her years

Me with my two brothers, Mom and Dad

Holding NonaJane's birthday party turned out to be a bit tricky seeing as it has been particularly rainy. Which normally would really annoy me. BUT now that we have this BEAUTIFUL pond in our front yard, suddenly rain has a new benefit.  When we moved in last year our pond was about 10 feet low.  It is now FULL, right up to the dock and I couldn't be more pleased! I remember saying "our pond will never be full. I can't imagine that it could ever rain enough to fill it"  and in saying this I apparently jinxed the state of Kansas to a year of rain, rain and more rain!!  oops.  (you can tell I really feel bad about this).  Anyways, the weather man said that we only had 4 dry days in the entire month of May.  We ended up having to postpone Nona's party- twice.  But nevertheless the party was held, the weather was beautiful and the celebration was fantastic.  Over the past year I have absolutely fallen in love with our home, and being able to have great parties is one of it's greatest attributes.  It's awesome having 20 plus people over at the drop of a hat, and my house can stay spotless (making my neat-freak self oh SO happy!).  The party barn serves as a perfect place for buffets of food, fridges of beer, and evenings filled with music, friendship, and outdoor enjoyment.

our family lunch

Matthew T looking particularly handsome

In fact, we were also able to host my Mom's 60th birthday party this May as well.  We pulled out my grandfather's croquet set (that we grew up playing with) and played our first family game of croquet in probably 15 years.  It brought such joy to my heart.  The memories of the croquet set, the games we played with Bobo and Dado, their HOT back yard, and fire ant hills.  It all came flooding back to me.  My brother Mark had drove all the way from Wisconsin to surprise my Mom. Probably the best present ever.  The 5 of us, the original Crabb clan, went out for lunch and spent some time together before joining the crazy kids and spouses back at our house.  There was something about having just the five of us together that was reassuring and cathartic.  Our family ties are still strong despite the miles between us, despite our busy lives and our aging years.  We still cherish each other and hold tight to those years we spent growing up together. Our childhood still bond us- a bond that holds memories, inside jokes, and a shared understanding about our lives and dreams.   Another bitter sweet part of life.  Our years together, just the 5 of us are no more. But we all have beautiful children, amazing spouses and jobs that take us in different directions.  My Mom turning 60 was a reminder that as time continues to relentlessly march,  that our family has only become bigger, sweeter, and more full of love than ever.

The croquet crew

My brother attacking his wife :)

Looking back at this May, my heart is full of gratitude.  I'm thankful for my husband that I fell in love with 8 years ago. I'm thankful for a job that I am passionate about, I'm thankful for my amazing Mom, my beautiful daughter, and everything else that the Month of May has to offer.  This May, though wet, has been a beautiful kickoff to what I hope to be an amazing summer.

The same brother now climbing a tree...

preparing to sing Happy Birthday to my Mom

I used to be sane... I think

Worth it all :)

   
I used to be a cool and calm Mom. I mean, I had it all together.  My kids' face were always clean, hair combed, I never thought twice about a trip to target.  Not so much anymore.  My inner crazy has come out.  My kids faces are dirty, heck I think my own face has been dirty a few times.  I think LONG and HARD before a trip to target.  I think "Is this really necessary? Can I just order it online and wait for it? Yes, yes I think I can, and I WILL."

Too cute for words

I used to be able to remain calm, gently listen to and redirect my children avoiding meltdowns and preventing sibling brawls.  Now I occasionally find myself egging them on "agh, I don't care just go figure it out yourselves" which is not the most helpful directions when given to a 3 and 5 year old.  It just seems that my mental capacity has not yet expanded for the demands of three needy children. I say "yet" because I have very high hopes that it will... and SOON.  I mean, the other day Jack's preschool had to call me because I forgot to come pick him up from school! I didn't exactly 'forget' but I did lose track of time... significantly.  I don't think there has been a day since I returned to work that I haven't forgotten something, I just prefer it to not be one of my children that I'm forgetting.  Usually it is a pump part, or my lunch, or Jack's backpack, or diapers for Matthew (it sucks pretty bad when you forget diapers for your kid too. In case you were wondering).

First time with all 3 on the swings

But nevertheless, we are surviving. And really, I am having quite a bit of fun.  In a weird way I am enjoying Matthews midnight feeding (and the 3 am, and the 6am) but I'm pretty sure that each interruption to my sleep is causing massive cell damage to my brain.  To help give you an idea of just how much time I spend nursing, and how much sleep I have lost- When Matthew and I are up during the night I watch Gilmore Girls on the iPad.  I've made it thru 7 seasons. That is a massive amount of sleep lost... massive.  I'm to the point that when I get woken up, I am confused as to where I am. I can't remember ever going to sleep from the last feed, and sometimes worry that I have merely blinked and lost track of time.  It can all be very disorienting! So if you've seen me lately, and I look disheveled, or perhaps a bit crazy... please have some mercy on me.  I promise this isn't my norm... or at least it never use to be!

Adam giving some friends a ride on his 'train'

Classic "let your child taste beer so they won't want anymore.... but it didn't work photo"

Nona's first BIG haircut!

Adam and NJ on his cart... before he finished all his work on it, and before her haircut!

The time Mom forgot to get their easter baskets down from the attic. I told them they wouldn't be the only ones with grocery sacks... but they were. The ONLY ones without cute adorable baskets.  Thanks a lot all you other Moms ;)

How NonaJane solves problems on a hot day when your not looking

The time we survived the stomach flu. Not fun at ALL

But sleep or no, time marches on and our baby girl turned 3 last weekend! We postponed her actual party because we had been having torrential rains and thunderstorms all week long.  The weather man predicted an 80% chance for severe storms for the day of her party.  So, of course the sun came out and it didn't rain a drop all day.  NonaJane was just as happy with the slip and slide and cake with her family.  We re-scheduled the party with her friends for this coming weekend.  So I am sure it will rain.  Sometimes you can't win, but with NonaJane everything can be made fun.  That girl knows how to make the best of anything, and the most of everything.

Jack also started T-Ball! I'll have to work on getting better pictures of him- as he is the cutest darn thing EVER in his gear.  But seeing as I was the most unprepared t-ball mom ever, things were a bit hectic for me.  I feel as if I was barely there at all.  Matthew was hungry and fussy, NonaJane was busy climbing up and down the bleachers in a never ending attempt to injure herself, and she was mad at me for not packing her a SNACK.  I was the stressed out Mom whom I'm sure the others were pitying! Next time I plan to pack supplies, and to sit very far away from the bleachers.  Maybe I'll get to see more of the game... maybe.
Well, my eyes are starting to cross and I should be heading to bed.  Until next time sweet blog... I'm sure we have a lot to catch up on.

Jack hitting the first pitch to him at his first t-ball game ever!